Wednesday, June 25, 2008


Lately, I've felt that I didn't satisfied with my work, the way I live my life, my current salary and the society around me. My love life? Haha. I keep on trying not to think about it because the result that I'll be in tears for the entire night. I keep on wondering why in the world that I met that special person to late? Haha, funny right? Would it be much different if I met that person earlier? Would that person want me to be part of that person life?

I actually looking for a new job right now. A job that can give me 'satisfaction'. I was attending an interview session in KLCC yesterday. Forget about to congratulate me as I, of cause, didn't get the job because I wasn't well prepared to answer the question good enough to satisfied the interviewer. They even can say directly that I'm not qualified for the job as they are looking for some experience person to work with them. Yeah, right! Why did in a first place they called me for that interview? I keep on thinking that they didn't have anything to do in the office or just want to have fun on their bored life. Why didn't they satisfied with my resume and my cover letter and wanting me to go to their 'great' office to humiliate me?

Answer for all of that, I don't have anything to show and satisfied them.

Every single month I didn't have enough money to spend. My expenses just goes boom much more bigger than I could afford. I couldn't save any single cent for this passed few month. I've worked for almost one year but I only have less than rm100 in my emergency saving account. I finished my money to pay my car installment, my house, my credit card and for this stupid reason, shopping. Every few days before that big 'pay day', I keep on promising to myself that I wouldn't spend much that I can afford on the next following month and keep on promising that I'll never ask my father to give me some money to survive until my pay day. But, the same thing keep on happening. As soon I get my salary, I forget my promises, spend on too much and the story keep on repeating every month.

Earlier this month I was spending happily in iSetan KLCC. I'm using my credit card when the cashier told me that the use of my credit card was rejected. I was shocked and the first thing passed on my mind is how much did I owed the bank. Did I spend too much? Ended up not paying the things, I went home in shocked.

My mistakes actually, when it was the time I supposed to study and get a better qualification, I was spending my time in the club and get drunk every night. I spent my money on that, paying for the one night happines that can give me nothing for my satisfaction today. I realized that it's nothing than a waste of time. I so much regret the way that I choose before. But, what can I do right? I didn't think much enough on that moment. Now, I can see the 'result' infront of my eyes. I can just only earned my second hand wira aeroback, working hard to get a less-than-enough salary and only can satisfied with all the cheapest things I can buy. Nothing that I can say that I bought that thing for thousand plus plus and to show off. Most importantly, nothing that I can proud of.

So, for those out there, who didn't satisfied with your life, try to change it. Not tomorow or later, but make your move now before it's too late. Don't just go with the simple solution you can think of such is suicide or taking drugs or might be looking for the cheapest entertainment you can get. Think first and choose for the best solution. For me, now I believe the important of study, the important of you getting that 'paper' for the better tomorow. Try to earn it. For sure, with the blessed of God, you can get a better tomorow.

Stay blessed. Peace out.

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