Monday, September 15, 2008

Colour Of My Life

'Pass is pass, think about your future'

How far did you ever put your believe on that phrase? How far will you forget about your pass and just live for the future? For me, I didn't put any percent of my trust into that words or even to anything on it. For me, what ever happen in the passed will create the way I'm standing today and the way of my life today will colour my life in the future.

I've actually have been on this situation before. Remember my interview with SPA? The last minute informed interview that I didn't attend because I don't put my full courage to attend the interview. Same goes with today. I don't even want to try to at least try change my habit of saying 'it's not my time yet'. And, it cause me the most disappointed feeling all night long. I was really-really frustrated until I can't even think about my empty wallet and of cause, I ended up sitting on this cheap chair I can afford so that I can face my loaned laptop to write down on this blog.

Damn, why in the end I had this feeling? Why after the chance is gone I have to think about my silly mistake? Why in this world I ever feel disappointed with my self? Why do I ever said it is nothing to regret of? Why I'm taking this thing so easily and why I never have any afford to change my future?

Might be because of I'm on my confort zone. Maybe because I was thinking, 'It's OK, at least I have my current work, and my salary is enough to cover my expences'. That stupid thinking. When I'm going to change? When I'll be have some efford to improve my self? Even I've seen few people that before was my junior, that right now have become the second level in the office. My turn? As I always say, next time. Not my time yet. Was it? Or just I don't have any effort to improve my self?

I was really-really disappointed to hear about the salary. Not to include the benefit, but who care? All I want is money this day. I've want to have everything that I dream of. I just wondering, how in this world I ever put aside the oppurtunity just because of a single stupid mistake? Why I never get ready for the future? Why?

Note : I was schedule to have an interview with DiGi Telecomunication BUT I didn't attend the interview just because of I didn't have the hardcopy of my resume. Can you tell how stupid I was?

1 comment:

  1. sabar je lah...
    dah bkn rezeki ko...
    life must go on...

    ~adamiedamuss~

    ReplyDelete

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